All your First Dance FAQ’s Answered
Diana and Brendan during their First Dance - photographed by Fern and Stone Photography
When should we start having lessons for our First Dance?
You can start lessons up to six months out from your wedding day or you can start literally the week of your wedding. There is no right or wrong. Obviously the earlier you start practicing the more confident you will feel with any routine you have prepared. If you are getting married within the week, there is still time to ease your nerves and learn some basics that will help you feel 100% more natural on the dance floor. When you start lessons may depend on how intricate you want your wedding dance to be. The longer and more impressive you want your choreography to be, the earlier you should start to learn you new moves!
Wherever you are in the lead up to your wedding day, starting to learn the basics always helps. This way it’s in your muscle memory and you don’t have to “think” on the day, you can just relax and be present in that special moment.
If you are having someone choreograph a wedding dance for you, it’s always great to have your last lesson at least three weeks before the big day. This gives you a chance to really solidify your moves and still have it somewhat fresh in your minds!
How long should a First Dance go for?
Your First Dance can be as long or as short as you like, after all it is your wedding day! Having said that, most First Dance choreographers will recommend between 90 seconds to 3 minutes. You want to find the perfect balance between being able to enjoy the moment, and not feeling like the dance is dragging on.
The earliest you would want to wrap up wedding dance or invite others up to join would be after the first verse and chorus are complete - this is usually around the 1.5 minute mark. On the flip side, if you dance for more than three minutes you can put a lot of pressure on you and your partner to remember lots of choreography and it becomes more stressful rather than an enjoyable moment. Short and sweet keeps it entertaining for your guests and well as fun and memorable for you!
How do you choose a First Dance song?
I get asked this all the time! Again there is no right and wrong but here are a few things you need to consider before choosing your song:
Very slow songs can be more difficult than mid-tempo songs. You really have to control your steps to ensure you don’t look rushed or panicked. Therefore moves to mid-tempo songs can feel quite natural for most people. Fast songs can also be quite tricky if you aren’t planning on preparing much in advance. If you aren’t the most confident dancer a slow to mid-tempo song is perfect to put you at ease!
Consider your dress/gown and shoes. If you have a very long train or an off the shoulder design be mindful that fast movements will be a little more challenging - go for something that will suit your attire. Or even better, get a secret second dress for dancing the night away!
Consider when in the order of your reception you will do your First Dance. More slow romantic wedding dance songs are suited if you are dancing quite early in your reception. If you want to dance towards the end of your formalities (after speeches and dinner), upbeat songs really work well to get the dance floor pumping!
How many first dance lessons will we need?
One is always better than none! The more lessons you have and/or the more practice you do, the more confident you will feel on your wedding day. However, there are options out there for couples on every budget. You can check out our free tutorials on youtube. You can sign up to our very affordable premium online program. You can also check out your local studios for group classes, private classes and even choreographers that come to you at home! Doing some sort of preparation, even if it is just the partner basics, can make a huge difference! It’s not about practicing to make your First Dance perfect. The more practice you do will, the less nervous you will feel and the more fun it is!
How much do first dance lessons cost? Are they worth it?
Wedding Dance lessons can be one of the best investments you make in your big day! Not only do they ease nerves and help you be in the moment, they also will help you feel more confident posing for your photographer during your portraits. Moreover, it’s one of the really fun activities you actually do together when planning your big day. Practicing your moves can help build excitement leading up to your wedding as well as providing some of your most cherished memories from the big day. Even more so, a great First Dance can get the dance floor rocking for the rest of the reception, really getting your party into full swing!
Here is a quick break down of the cost of lessons in Australia ($AUD):
$0 ~ Free Youtube Tutorials
$100 ~ Premium Online Course to DIY your memorable Wedding Dance (access starts at 3 months)
$80 ~ Single 45 minute Private Lesson at a studio
$150+ ~ 60 minute Private In-home lesson (travel charged extra)
$300+ ~ 90 Minute Private In-home lesson with choreography notes, videos and music editing
We are both completely uncoordinated, do wedding dance lessons actually help?
The biggest YES! Practicing for 20 minutes as opposed to nothing helps more than you can imagine. Just knowing how to enter, where to put your arms and feet can really put your mind at ease. Learning how to sway comfortable alone can skyrocket your confidence from zero to hero, add in learning how to turn your partner and you’re feeling First Dance ready in no time.
Remember there are dance lesson solutions for all budgets and you don’t have to go spending hundreds of dollars for private tuition. Check out our free online tutorials. Or experience our premium online program with everything you need to know right here and get mastering the basics in under an hour!
What dance style should we do for our First Dance?
There are so many different styles out there, it depends on the tempo of your song and how up for the challenge you are! You may like to choose a traditional waltz, a sultry salsa or a surprising swing dance! Usually the faster the style, the more challenging it is for beginners to pick up the moves. Most First Dance songs will suit moves from Rumba and Foxtrot styles if you were wanting to research particular moves to learn at home.
More and more there is a shift for Wedding Dances to incorporate a number of styles rather than keeping strictly to one dance style. The basic dance steps cut across all genres so you may find that your chic modern dance isn’t limited to a particular style but a fusion that is customised to suit your song and skill levels.
Tips on how to dance in your wedding dress?
Bustle your train if possible to make moving around the floor easier. Alternatively, use a dance hook (small ribbon underneath the end of your train) and hold this in your left hand. Holding the train of your wedding gown in your left hand, keeps your right arm free if your partner turns or spins you, making it so much easier to dance!
Other helpful tips are to ensure you are both standing offset to the left of each other, not toe to toe with each other. See our free youtube or online tutorials for more info. Also practice in your shoes and a long skirt/dress before the big day to start feeling a little more comfortable. If you are having someone choreograph your First Dance, be mindful on any restrictions your wedding gown may have before learning any steps.
What dances are done at Weddings? And in what order?
Other than the First Dance, sometimes their will be a Father-Daughter dance and a Mother-Son dance. That is the bride will dance with her dad, and the groom with his mum. Traditionally the newlyweds would be first (hence called the First Dance beginning/opening the celebrations) followed by any dances with parents. Obviously traditions change over time and there are no strict rules, you should always do what suits you best.
If you do opt to have dance with your parents; it’s becoming more and more popular for the Father-daughter dance and Mother-son dance to be had at the same time rather than having separate songs and two separate dances. This is down to personal choice and you should feel free to do what suits you and your event! If couples choose to have two separate dance with their parents, these tend to be broken up throughout the formalities of the reception. But remember, there is no right or wrong, you should do what feels right for you both!